Author: admin

Friends have always played a hugely important role in my life.  Never more so than during the pre-teens years when I was in the middle of a growth spurt with pants two inches above the ankle and a voice box vibrating between alto and baritone. I ran with street kids and trust fund heirs alike.  Together we shared acne and raging hormones and the faux courage we gave each as we took the first, tentative steps on the path to the frightening concept called adulthood.We went to high school together and conspired and confided without a trace of snobbery. For more than half my friends, college was not an option. I hung out with future stenographers, carpenters and mechanics without condescension.  Tuning the motor on my 1935 Ford was no less important than my score on the Coll...

Ah yes, the occasional squabble between husband and wife over some issue so unimportant it’s too embarrassing to admit, as in “You left the light on in the kitchen” or “Why didn’t you pick up the mail when I asked you to?”  In reply, I have two options.Option one: “So I forgot… “followed by a pugnacious “What’s the big deal?”   (Dumb! Don’t even think it! Pandora’s Box will open wide!).Option two: “Sorry, hon, I wasn’t thinking…” followed by “My bad, I’ll do it now.”  (Smart!  Realize wife worked all day.  Quickly conclude a smidgeon of humble pie is zillion times preferable to pie thrown in face).Life is short, my friend!  And I have learned time and time again that taking a stand over a petty issue is like swallowing poison and expecting the oth...

There are days when I wake up feeling hopelessly despondent and about as relevant as a party-line, wall-mounted, rotary telephone.  That’s my daily challenge, to resist the self-deprecating tendency to think I have nothing left to live for; no value to contribute; no purpose whatsoever for still hanging around.I have to remind myself that when the sports teams I root for get shellacked that is not cause for leaving cremation instructions for the coroner and a note under the pillow, ‘goodbye world, I’ve had enough.  More importantly, I am not suffering from the creeping hell of something like amyotrophic lateral sclerosis or living under a viaduct trying to survive by begging for quarters with a crumbling Starbucks cup.I take a shower instead of a pity bath.  And as the d...

I am beset with childhood memories of living in a similar time: before the Civil Rights Bill; before Roe v Wade; before the Americans with Disabilities Act.I remember how bleak and uninviting my neighborhood was, the paint peeling off the porches and heartbreak and tragedy behind every doorway.  A kid from a rival high school basketball team got in a fight after a game and died from a stab wound to his windpipe.  A young, innocent girl down the block blossomed into a woman and was shunned as a pariah as the responsibilities of motherhood arrived before the good judgment of adulthood.  The strongest, toughest kid in the class couldn’t beat the scourge of polio and left school never to be heard from again.It was a gritty existence that rubbed off on me and left me raw...

Ordinarily I get out of bed with an attitude of gratitude, thinking positive thoughts and planning a day that includes more than becoming a lump on the sofa.  And then there are the occasional days when my inner spirit and higher purpose simply do not show up!What do I do then, when my Better Self is stuck in the toilet and sitting on my meditation pillow feels like a method of execution favored by Vlad the Impaler!I use the practical tools that a disengaged, disinterested and disagreeable old man can use without a single ‘deep’ thought.First, I breathe, taking full advantage of my pot belly. I inhale, watching that Pillsbury Doughboy fill up like a big red balloon, then slowly exhaling until the tire is flat. I do it five times, consciously, fully focused on each breath.&...